āA ābid for connectionā is, sinply put, anything you do or your partner does to try to grt the other personās attention and connection with themā¦ These are small, fleeting moments throughout the day- the minor asides and interactions that can be easy to miss if youāre busy or stressed. But what we saw in the Love Lab, with our three thousand couples, is that they mattered- a lot.ā from FIGHT RIGHT by Julie Swartz Gottman, PhD & John Gottman, PhD @TheGottmanInstitute #healthyrelationships #relationshipadvice