My heart breaks for those who have been betrayed by the person that was supposed to be their safety, their harbor, and home. In the wake of betrayal it can feel like in order to heal justice must be served. You need to make things equal. Take a pound of flesh for a pound of flesh. There is a hole in your heart and so there must be a hole in theirs. It makes sense why you would feel this way. It’s very justifiable. But the laws of justice and equity have no power here. There’s no way it could ever be equal. There’s nothing that you can do, or punishment they could suffer that would reverse time and take it back. I’m not sitting here on my high horse telling those who are in agony over the heart of betrayal “how to do this, right” and to just offer up that grace. No, I’m offering a bit of a road map and maybe even relief. Relief at knowing that you don’t have to figure out how to punish them. You don’t have to make it makes sense, ever. This kind of wound is not solved through justice, equity, or logic. It’s healed through first honesty, humility, understanding, and deep compassion. The kind of compassion that makes a persons heart break. They have to go to this place of humility and compassion in order to have a chance at healing what they have done. Second it’s healed through grace. Letting go of the parts you cannot fix. The gap you cannot with all the logic in the world bridge. Let that grace come one moment at a time and start with you. I know you say hurtful things about yourself. “I’m so stupid. I can’t believe I believed them.” Give yourself grace. My name is Trevor. Me and my team help people like you heal wounds and repair relationships. Send me a message if you’d like to book a free consultation where we can chat about your goals and set up an appointment. . . #betrayaltrauma #brokentrust #couplestherapist #utahtherapist